How to get more rest, how to tell the baby blues from postnatal depression, and when to ask for help for yourself.
In short
- Rest when your baby sleeps.
- The baby blues usually pass within 2 weeks.
- Tell your doctor if you feel low.
Getting more rest
Looking after a baby is tiring, most of all in the first months. Try to rest when your baby sleeps. Rest can matter more than chores. Set an alarm if you worry about sleeping too long.
If you have a partner, share the nights. If you formula feed, they can do some feeds. If you breastfeed, they can do nappies and dressing in the morning while you go back to sleep.
Ask a friend or relative to look after your baby while you nap. A short walk every day, with your baby, can help you feel less tired.
Baby blues or depression?
Feeling down, anxious or irritable for a few days after the birth is very common. This is called the baby blues. It usually goes within 2 weeks.
If it lasts longer, gets worse or you cannot cope, it may be postnatal depression. It can start any time in the first year. Fathers and partners can have it too. Up to 1 in 5 mothers and 1 in 10 fathers have depression or anxiety during pregnancy or in the first year.
Signs include low mood, finding it hard to enjoy anything, and feeling hopeless or guilty. You may worry all the time, or struggle to sleep even when you get the chance. You may find it hard to bond with your baby. Get help even if you have only some of these signs. With the right help, you are more likely to get better.
Many parents fear their baby will be taken away if they ask for help. That is very rare. Your care team will support you to care for your baby.
Asking for help
Talk about how you feel with someone you trust. Ask for help with shopping, chores and childcare. A local parent and baby group can help too.
Tell your doctor, midwife or health visitor how you feel. Your 6 to 8 week postnatal check is a good time to talk about your body and your mind.
Rarely, you may become very unwell soon after the birth. You may see or hear things that are not there, or feel very high or confused. This is called postpartum psychosis. It needs a doctor the same day. If anyone is in danger, call your emergency number now. A partner or family member may notice the signs first.
